Solitude

I have recently seen a very long documentary call "milestone", it is based a very famous poem of Hochiminh, the documentary was about a group of hippi, intellectual who lived in the US after the VN war. We are obviously far from that state of living, that innocent, generous way of life. People care for each other, help each other without having to think whether the person deserves help, when a problem of a person is the problem of a group, when it is your own problem and you fear to bring the whole group down with you...When I talk about being generous, I don't mean it in any financial or only a character, I mean generous in the thought as well. Generosity actually becomes a habit, the right thing to do toward each other and not anything exceptional.

When I went out with friends and talked about music or movies or books, some of my friends sometimes just stops talking, stares at me and says "my gosh, it seems to me you like old music" :-). I guess I really am belong to another era. Maybe this is a bad dream, and when I wake up, I could enjoy all the good things around me, but then again, maybe I probably wake up wishing that I would have known all the great people that I have met? :-). I listen to a lot of jazz, a lot of blues, a lot of Jacque Brel, a lot of "The animals". Honestly, these stuffs touch my soul deeply. The lyrics, the way they sang their songs. When I was in VN, if it was about French songs, there were Vanessa Paradis (love her last name), Adamo (many cheesy love songs but then again, we Vnese are maybe romantic at heart), I used to love French a lot, beautiful language. My uncle in VN listened to the Bee Gee, I remembered I was wiping the floor and thinking how much I liked those songs even though I had absolutely no ideas what they were about. I guess it is not about I like old music, it might be more about my ears have been accustomed to listening to them...

Anyway, the same for books, I love books that give me insights or when I know there are a lot of research to do. So, I usually check the reference pages :-), am I crazy? I am reading a book on Belgium's history and how it relates to the EU institutions, brilliant book. Some of the stuffs I begin to understand better...Hmm, some of the things I will bring up for discussion when I see my Belgian friends.

Solitude, this is a state of mind that sometimes I have. It is not exactly loneliness because I am surrounded by my friends, my mom, and uncle, have fun in weekends. Solitude to me is more in not having someone who shares your thoughts or ideas. Maybe some of the ideas, my friends support and share with me but sometimes I feel as if the fundamental score that I try to convey is not successfully shared.

Probably too serious for a post?