The art of entertaining

I remember when I first arrived in Belgium, I was very amazed with the way that people entertain. Of course, at first, I was quite annoyed at the fact that every time my uncle and his ex-wife had someone over for dinner, Tatie often made a fuss (sorry :-)) about the china, the silver cutlery, the table clothes, the candles, where to sit your guests...etc, and then you got to eat only one dish at the time :-). I thought of VN, every time we invite somebody, we put all the foods on the table, people site where they want, no fuss about the china and least of the cutlery as we use chopsticks :-).

As I live longer in Belgium and begin to understand that everything is like an art here, making food, drinking wines, so of course inviting people is also an art, an art to entertain your guests, I have become fond of this. Well, I am not really into china or cutlery but more about foods and drinks :-).

So, I have now taken a wine tasting course. I used to like world wines a lot, maybe because they taste good and cheaper than the French wines but to my surprises, after several wine lessons, I begin to really love French wines (yeah, the French really know how to make something an art :-)). I have been to Bordeaux, Champagnes and visit several vine yards or champagne houses, and every time, I fall in love with the region for the know how of the people. Everything from the tasting techniques (which is really cool) to how to distinguish the "au nez" and "en bouche". Of course, I know nothing of whether a wine taste like honey or caramel (every time the teacher says that a wine tastes like honey, I just frowned and said "really?, I can't detect the honey smell" :-) thinking maybe I should put my nose into the honey jar in the weekend to really know how honey smells :-). And yes, spitting out eight glasses of very good wines is easier than I thought it would be :-0), I who never refuse a glass of wine hehehe.

Anyway, last weekend I invited an older couple friends (they are 50s something, I know the husband through the chinese lessons in the past) for dinner to also introduce my mom. I was so excited thinking I would have a chance to show off what i had learnt about wines :-). Turned out the lady did not drink any drop of alcohol :-), and I had reserved different sort of wines. In the end, I had to settle for the happiness of being able to speak broken Flemish to her because she only speaks Flemish. That's another thing, I thought I learnt nothing with that language, it seems I just need more practice. Hmm, I really should read more in Flemish.

I hope this coming Sat, my favourite crowd will be luckier with some bottles I chose for them :-0)

A fool

I am super pissed.

The thing is nowadays if you try to be understandable and nice to people, they think you are stupid. We live in a society where people just take everything for granted, if you step back one step, or give your hands, they want to step over you or try to take your whole arms.

People are so insincere, they can really lie right in your face and no blink in their eyes. How can they do that?

To make things easier and simple, some of us just need to make the choice of letting go so that everybody is happy. No more pain...

..."I bite my lip.
I buy what I'm told:
From the latest hit,
To the wisdom of old.
But I'm always alone.
And my heart is like ice.
And it's crowded and cold
In My Secret Life"

Bird's nest

My mom arrived here. She is adjusting fine and even though she feels that the weather is a bit cold, she finds it is nice that the street is quieter, every dog that walks on the street is cute...I am glad that so far mom does not feel lonely when we are not home or around her.

While my mom is slowly adjusted, I, on the other hand, have some difficulties to have my mom around. Don't get me wrong, I love her and excited that she is finally here. The thing is I have been living on my own for a long time, I am used to all the space that I have...I used to hug mom or hold her until when I was 18 years old when I was in VN, now it is just a bit awkward to even give her a hug. What drives me nut is that she keeps on saying that she is too old to do anything (she is only 53 years!) and so is afraid of everything and worries about everything. She is also easy to get offended, so whenever i make my points, she is upset.

Maybe I am like a bird, when you grow up and leave the nest, it is difficult to go back? When has things changed? or when have I become more of the person who belongs to an individualism culture and not the collectism society in order words, I become selfish?

I don't want to hurt mom's feelings because I understand that it takes a long time to see the difference, to adapt to a new enviroment. I wish i could put myself in my mom's shoes to understand the way she perceives things. Mom has gone through my age but I have not obviously.

Anyway, things will probably get better, it has only been a week...

About Horses

Yeah, as the title suggested my mind is in the wandering mode.

No, I am not sure if it is in that mode but at least I know it has been in ecstasy, not the joy ecstasy, I am afraid ;-(, my body was floating in the air with no soul but I feel constantly the intense pain, a kind of pain that is so real that can never be healed. Anyway, that is a subject for another day where the pain might go to sleep...

So, I was thinking about horses, it was because in Xinran's book, a horse suicided (yep, you heard me right) to save two ladies when it approched a cliff in the dark and only felt the danger when it came close...A friend laughed but well, I do think horses can actually sacrifice themselves for their masters. I saw many movies about this when i was younger, some legendary horses. All these great characters, wild, stubborn (ok, not so great), faithful, independent...

Did I say my Chinese astrology sign is a horse :-)?

yeah, silly post, I just wanted to write something to lessen my pain...

Just thoughts

I finished reading "Nothing to Envy" book, it reminds me so much of Vn during the 80s. FYI, the book is about to North Koreans's lives. Maybe what I like from the book the most was the love between two young persons who finally have gone different ways.

I am now reading ' Sky Burial' of Xin Ran, a very good comtemporary chinese writer, she is the author of "The Good Women of China"...In this book, I enjoy the journey of a newly wife who went on journey to look for her lost husband in Tibet. Maybe the intensity of her love really moves me, I am not sure if we modern women would set a journey to an unknown land, where you don't speak the language, when there is a war and all other dangers that await for us.

Anyway, I should be happy at the moment because my mom will be in about two weeks or so, and I am but sometimes, my mood just sort of swings to the melancholy side for a few hours and I am unable to determine what and why :-). I guess not even that, it actually is an unsatistified and restless feeling.

My feelings are exactly like "Everybody knows" of Leonard Cohen ;-), it is like everything seems calm on the surface but it is like there is a largest storm within me. It is like I am lost and even if there is a clear direction for me to take, I don't want to take it. Can that be possible? I would like to find a deeper explanation of things. Maybe I really have to go on a spiritual journey like "Eat, Love, Pray" :-) or maybe the fact of fighting the zombification process that the society is forcing us. After all, we are living in a processed world. Everything is being processed, foods, pleasure, lifestyles...

I have always amazed on the way people meet, I find it is fascinating that I live in Belgium even though I was born in VN :-). Am I crazy thinking that? It's probably because I always believe in destiny, you meet some people because you have had an appointment since your previous lives. Is that a sign that because I believe in that, most of my very good friends I met them in the most strangest circumtances :-). I love that.

...still feeling restless